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The QUOTES Page

A list of my favorite quotes. Hope you like'em!

"An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind."
- Mahatma Gandhi
"Anyone who is capable of getting themselves made president should
on no account be allowed to do the job."
- Douglas Adams
"The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you
can fake that, you've got it made."
- Groucho Marx (1890-1977)
"Nobody goes there anymore; it's too crowded."
- Yogi Berra
"Focus on what you are moving toward rather than what you are leaving behind."
- Alan Cohen
"There will be days when you don't think you can run a marathon. There will be a lifetime of knowing that you did."
- Anonymous
"Long ago when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks
it was called witchcraft. Today it`s called GOLF!"
- Unknown
"A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort."
- Herm Albright
"Failure is simply the opportunity to begin again,
this time more intelligently"
- Henry Ford
"A life of reaction is a life of slavery, intellectually and
spiritually. One must fight for a life of action, not reaction."
- Rita Mae Brown, Author and Playwright
"Do something every day that you don't want to do; this is the
golden rule for acquiring the habit of doing your duty without pain.
Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes
you nothing. It was here first!"
- Mark Twain
"The difference between truth and fiction: fiction has to make sense."
- Mark Twain
"Mankind shall not be free until the last king is strangled in the
entrails of the last priest."
- Diderot (1713-1784) on atheism
"Religion has actually convinced people that there's an invisible
man living in the sky who watches everything you do."
- George Carlin on atheism
1. Take into account that great love and great achievements involve great risk.
2. When you lose, don't lose the lesson.
3. Follow the three Rs: Respect for self, respect for others and responsibility for all your actions
4. Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck.
5. Learn the rules so you know how to break them properly
6. Don’t let a little dispute injure a great friendship
7. When you realize you've made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.
8. Spend some time alone every day
9. Open your arms to change, but don't let go of your values.
10. Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer
11. Live a good, honorable life. Then when you get older and think back, you’ll be able to enjoy it a second time.
12. A loving atmosphere in your home is the foundation for your life.
13. In disagreements with loved ones, deal only with the current situation. Don't bring up the past.
14. Share your knowledge. It's a way to achieve immortality.
15. Be gentle with the earth..
16. Once a year, go some place you've never been before
17. Remember that the best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other.
18. Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it.
19. Approach love and cooking with reckless abandon.
Dalai Lama, Instructions for Life in the new millennium
"Philosophy is akin to kicking up a great deal of dust, then
complaining that you can't see."
- Libnitz?
"Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one."
- Albert Einstein
"Never attribute to malice what can satisfactorily be
explained away by stupidity."
- Unknown
"Terrorism is the use of violence against civilians to promote
a cause so unpopular that is cannot succeed without intimidation."
- Marilyn Savant
"War does not determine who is right - only who is left."
- Bertrand Russell
Hofstadter's Law states that it always takes longer than
you expect, even when you take into account Hofstadter's Law.
- Douglas Hofstadter
"The only reason some people get lost in thought is because
it's unfamiliar territory."
- Paul Fix
"90% of the putts that are short don't go in."
- Yogi Berra
DANCE as though no one is watching you
LOVE as though you have never been hurt before
SING as though no one can hear you
LIVE as though heaven is on earth
-souza
"People tend to overestimate what can be accomplished in the short run
and underestimate what can be accomplished in the long run."
- Arthur C. Clarke
"I love the smell of marijuanna in the morning; it
smells like......stupidity!"
- Tom Brennan, paraphrasing "Apocylpse Now"
"They laughed at Galileo. They laughed at Newton. But
they also laughed at Bozo the Clown."
- Carl Sagan
"If you think you can, or if you think you can't, you're right!"
- Henry Ford
"What if the Hokey-Pokey really IS what it's all about?!!"
- t-shirt

"Top Ten Reasons to Procrastinate:

    1."

- t-shirt
"If it weren't for the Rural Electric Association, the farmers would
be watching TV by candlelight."
- State legislator
"I'm in favor of letting the status quo stay as it is."
- Senator Tremain
"The saints are sinners that kept trying."
- Unknown
"When God created the world in seven days, he didn't have to deal
with the installed base."
- Tim Wilsom, Lucent Technologies
"The only place where success comes before work is the dictionary."
- Unknown
"Those who stand for nothing will fall for anything.
- Unknown
"The towels were so thick there I could hardly close my suitcase."
- Yogi Berra
"My karma almost ran over my dogma!"
- Unknown
"It's never too late to have a happy childhood."
- Unknown
"Empowerment is the process of shifting blame from you to
the employees."
- Scott Adams
"Television is a medium, so called because it is neither rare, nor well done."
- Ernie Kovacs
"The only difference I ever found between the Democratic leadership
and the Republican leadership is that one of them is skinning you
from the ankle up and the other, from the neck down."
- Huey P. Long
"Imagine if TV were actually good: It would be the
end of life as we know it."
- Marvin Minsky, MIT
"Imitation is the sincerest form of plagerism."
- Steve Ratcliff
"The greatest mistake one can make is to be afraid
to make one."
- Unknown
"Middle age is when your broad mind and narrow waist begin
to change places."
- E. Joseph Cossman
"A committee is a group that keeps minutes and loses hours."
- Milton Berle
"Instead of giving a politician the keys to the city, it
might be better to change the locks."
- Doug Larson
"If opportunity doesn't knock, build a door."
- Milton Berle
"The way I see it, if you want the rainbow, you gotta put
up with the rain."
- Dolly Parton
"Too bad all the people who know how to run the country are
busy driving taxicabs and cutting hair."
- George Burns
"Common sense is genius dressed in its working clothes."
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
"You can live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that
make you want to live to be a hundred."
- Woody Allen
"After you've heard two eyewitness accounts of an auto accident,
it makes you wonder about history."
- Bits & Pieces
"I think it would be a good idea."
Ghandi was asked during a tour of the USA what he thought of Western
civilization.
"Did you eat the blue one? Oh, man, I wouldn't want to be you in an hour"
-Tommy Chong
"I knew I was an unwanted child when I saw my bath toys were
a toaster and a radio."
- Joan Rivers
"The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life.
Attitude to me is more important than facts. It is more important than
the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than failure,
than success, than what other people think, say or do. It is more
important than appearance, giftedness or skill. It will make or break
a company, a church, a home. The remarkable thing is we have a choice
every day regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day. We
cannot change our past. We cannot change the fact that other people will
act in a certain way. We cannot change the ineveitable. The only thing
we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude.
I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react
to it. And so it is with your life. We are in charge of our attitudes."
- Charles Swindoll
"Nothing unreal exists"
- Mr. Spock, Star Trek
"Mother Nature is more like Joan Crawford than
June Cleaver."
- Chris Crowley
"When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro."
- Hunter S. Thompson
"When you are in it up to your ears, keep
your mouth shut."
- Unknown
"If you truly want to understand something,
try to change it.
- Kurt Lewin
"If you put a small value on yourself, rest assured
that the world will not raise the price."
- Unknown
"No matter what happens, there's always somebody
who knew it would."
- Lonny Starr
"Obstacles are things a person sees when
he takes his eye off his goal."
- E. Joseph Cossman
"A professional is someone who can do his best
work when he doesn't feel like it."
- Alistair Cooke
"Sometimes you have to look reality in the
eye and deny it."
- Garrison Keillor
"Motivation is what gets you started.
Habit is what keeps you going."
- Jim Ryun
"We reserve the right to serve refuse to anyone."
- Seen on the wall of the Westerner Diner in Moab, Utah
"Yes I am moody, but it doesn't mean you're not irritating!"
- Seen on the wall of the Westerner Diner in Moab, Utah
"Youth and skill are no match for old age and treachery."
- Seen on the wall of the Westerner Diner in Moab, Utah
"The first person to make a mountain out of a mole hill was a
real estate agent."
- Seen on the wall of the Westerner Diner in Moab, Utah
"Don't worry about what other people are thinking about
you. They're too busy worrying over what you are thinking
of them."
- Unknown
"If the human brain were so simple that we could
understand it, we would be too simple to be able
to understand it."
- Unknown
"Only the mediocre are always at their best."
- Unknown
"Life is like a dog-sled team. If you ain't the lead dog,
the scenery never changes."
- Lewis Grizzard
"Admit your errors before someone exaggerates them."
- Anthony V. Mason, M.D.
"Only a fool tests the depth of the water with both feet."
- African proverb
"Programming today is a race between software engineers stirring
to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe
trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe
is winning."
- Rich Cook
"The difference between a politician and a snail is
that a snail leaves its slime behind.
- Gerrold's Pronouncement
"Good judgement comes from experience and
experience comes from bad judgement."
- Fred Brooks, University of North Carolina
"Under the most rigorously controlled conditions, the
experimental apparatus will do exactly as it pleases."
- Unknown
"Life is like a horse; either you ride it
or it rides you!"
- Unknown
"Any sufficiently well-developed technology is
indistinguishable from magic."
- Unknown
"Great minds discuss ideas,
average minds discuss events,
small minds discuss people."
- Adm. Hyman G. Rickover
"One person's constant is another person variable."
- Susan Gerhart
"The possibility of being watched is proportional to
the stupidity of your action."
- Unknown
"Horowitz's Rule: A computer makes as many mistakes
in two seconds as twenty men working twenty years."
- Stanley Horowitz
"To err is human, but to really foul things up requires
a computer."
- The Farmers Almanac
"Nothing is ever gained without risk. You can't steal
second base with one foot on first."
- Unknown
"First Law of Wing-Walking: Never let go of what you've
got until you've got hold of something else."
- Anonymous
"An idea can turn to dust or magic, depending on the
talent that rubs against it."
- William Bernback
"If the top man is no good, all the people below him
will be no good in the same way."
- Jacob Rabinow
"Tell me and I may forget.
Show me and I may remember.
Involve me and I will understand."
- Chinese proverb
"Never say you know a man until you have divided an
inheritance with him."
- Unknown
"Assumption is the mother of all screw-ups."
- Unknown
"There is nothing so simple that is cannot be done wrong."
- Unknown
"The technology is easy, the politics are hell."
- Daniel E. Crain, Manager of Technology Planning for
Prudential Realty Group
"Inovate, automate or evaporate. Otherwise you've made a strategic
decision to be out of business in five to ten years."
- D. Bruce Merrifield, Assistant Secretary U.S. Commerce Dept.
"It's like deja vu all over again."
- Yogi Berra
"Life is a great big canvas, and you should throw all the paint
on it you can."
- Danny Kaye
"Trying to squash a rumor is like trying to unring a bell."
- Shana Alexander
"The principle mark of genius is no perfection but originality,
the opening of new frontiers."
- Arthur Koestler
"Mind unemployed is mind unenjoyed."
- Christian Nestell Bovee
"I have never let my schooling interfere with my education."
- Mark Twain
"Not failure, but low aim, is crime"
- James Russell Lowell
"Old minds are like old horses: you must exercise them if you wish
to keep them in order."
- John Quincy Adams
"Nothing is really work unless you would rather be doing
something else."
- Sir James Matthew Barrie
"The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer
someone else up."
- Mark Twain
"There are only two kinds of people in computing: those
who have already lost data and those who will. There
are only two kinds of people who have lost data: those
who had backups and those who didn't."
- Unknown
"Consider pleasures as they depart, not as they come."
- Aristotle
"All change is not growth, as all movement is not forward."
- Ellen Glasgow
"The rule on staying alive as a forecaster is to give 'em a number or
give 'em a date, but never give 'em both at once."
- Jane Bryant Quinn
"Don't find fault. Find a remedy"
- Henry Ford
"In matters of principle, stand like a rock; in matters of taste,
swim with the current."
- Thomas Jefferson
"When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had
happened or not."
- Mark Twain
"A man's feet should be planted in his coutry, but his eyes
should survey the world."
- George Santayana
"The fire you kindle for your enemy often burns yourself
more than him."
- Chinese Proverb
"Happiness make up in height for what it lacks in length."
- Robert Lee Frost
"An unusual amount of common sense is sometimes called wisdon."
- unknown
"It is better to be sometimes cheated than not to trust."
- Samuel Johnson
"The enemy of the university is not dissent, not disagreement,
not disagreeableness. Gentility is the mark of a great
finishing school, not a university."
- Ernest Boyer, president of the Carnegie Foundation
"Experience is not what happens to you; it is what you do with
what happens to you."
- Aldous Huxley
"Anxiety is interest paid on trouble before it falls due."
- William Inge
"I have never met a man so ignorant this I couldn't learn
something from him."
- Galileo Galilie
"To say that a man is made up of certain checmical elements is
a satisfactory description only for those who intend to use
him as a fertilizer."
- Herbert J. Muller
"A great many open minds should be closed for repairs"
- Toledo Blade
"If people think nature is their friend, then they sure don't
need an enemy."
- Kurt Vonnegut
"Intelligence has a lot to do with what folks believe. Those with
smart kids, for example, are more likely to believe in
heredity."
- Frank Clark
"Men become more civilized, not in proportion to their
willingness to believe, but in proportion to their readiness to
doubt."
- H. L. Mencken
"A man will sometimes devote all his life to the development of
one part of his body - the wishbone."
- Rovert Lee Frost
"Wise men think out their thoughts; fools proclaim them."
- Heinrich Heine
"Yes, they're sons of bitches, but they're OUR sons of bitches.
- Franklin Roosevelt
"The gem cannot be polished without friction, nor man perfected
without trials."
- Chinese Proverb
"The clash of ideas is the sound of freedom."
- Unknown
"Home is a place where you grow up wanting to leave, and grow old
wanting to get back to."
- John Ed Pearce
"The most difficult thing in the world is to know how to do a thing
and to watch someone else doing it wrong, without comment."
- Theodore H. White
"If we could sell our experiences for what they cost us, we'd
all millionaires."
- Abigail Van Buren
"Man blames fate for other accidents, but feels personally
responsible when he makes a hole-in-one."
- Unknown
"To me old age is always fifteen years older than I am."
- Bernard Baruch
"Nothing makes a person more productive than the last minute."
- Unknown
"There is no substitute for incomprehensible good luck."
- Lynne Alpern & Esther Blumenfeld
"It pays to be obvious, especially if you have a reputation
for subtlty."
- Isaac Asimov
"Snow and adolescence are the only problems that disappear
if you ignore them long enough."
- Earl Wilson
"The man who has no imagination has no wings."
- Muhammad Ali
"Bring ideas in and entertain them royally, for one of
them may be the king."
- Mark Van Doren
"Freedom of the press is guaranteed only to those who own one."
- A. J. Liebling
"Smart is when you believe only half of what you hear. Brilliant
is when you know which half to believe."
- Orben's Current Comedy
"The fewer the facts, the stronger the opinion."
- Arnold H. Glasgow
"One way to prevent conversation from being boring is to say
something wrong."
- Frank Sheed
"It's not easy taking my problems one at a time when they
refuse to get in line."
- Ashleigh Brilliant
"Death and taxes may always be with us, but death at least
doesn't get any worse."
- Los Angeles Times Syndicate
"All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no
attention to criticism."
- North DeKalb Kiwanis Club Beacon
"Time flies like an arrow;
fruit flies like a banana."
- Groucho Marx
"You ain't learning nothing when you're talking."
- Unknown
"Health is merely the slowest possible rate that one can die."
- Unknown
"The closest to perfection a person ever comes is when
he fills out a job application form."
- Stanley J. Randall
"Voice Mail is a system that has been developed to eliminate the
irritation of being placed on 'hold' by large companies and
replace it with the irritation of having an electronic voice
that sounds like a grandmother after unsuccessful brain surgery
ask you a series of multiple-choice questions that you must
answer correctly if you wish to speak to an actual human being
who will place you on 'hold.'"
- Dave Barry
"Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over
if you just sit there."
- Will Rogers
"In times of change, learners inherit the earth. Whereas, the
learned find themselves beautifully equipped to deal with a
world that no longer exists."
- Eric Hoffer
"The six steps in coputer a project:
1) Unbounded enthusiasm
2) Total disillusionment
3) PANIC!!
4) Frantic search for the guilty
5) Punishment of the innocent
6) Promotion of the uninvolved."
- Unknown
"When working toward the solution of a problem, it always
helps if you know the answer."
- Unknown
"Estimate the time you think it should take, multiply by 2,
add 3, and change the unit of measure to the next higher unit."
- Westheimer`s Time Estimation Rule
"If you fail to plan, you plan to fail."
- Unknown
"When the only tool you have is a hammer, every problem
starts to look like a nail."
- Unknown
"You better cut the pizza into four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six."
- Yogi Berra
"There is no reason for any individual to have a computer
in their home."
- Ken Olsen, former president of Digital Equipment Corp. in 1977
"I think there is a total world market for about five computers."
- Thomas J. Watson, chairman of IBM in 1943
"If it doesn't fit, you're not hitting it hard enough."
- Unknown
"Education's purpose is to replace an empty mind with an open one."
- Malcolm S. Forbes
"There are no answers, only cross-references."
- Unknown
"May all your troubles last as long as your New Year's
resolutions."
- Joey Adams
"Often statistics are used as a drunken man uses lampposts
for support rather than illumination."
- Unknown
"Never attribute to malice that which is adequately
explained by stupidity."
- Hanlon
"If computers take over (which seems to be their natural
tendency), it will serve us right."
- Alistair Cooke.
"A wise man can see more from a the bottom of a well than a
fool can from a mountain top."
- Unknown
"I hesitate to talk about the future because we have found that as
soon as you say something about the future, someone claims to
have it today."
- Curtis Crawford, vice-president IBM
"Wise men think out their thoughts: fools proclaim them."
- Heinrich Heine
"Exhilaration is that feeling you get just after a great idea
hits you and just before you realize what's wrong with it."
- Unknown
"It's not that I'm afraid to die. I just don't want to be there
when it happens."
- Woody Allen
"Bite off more than you can chew; then chew it!"
- Jerry Johnson
"May all your troubles during the coming year be as short as
your New Year's resolutions."
- Irish toast
"Sometimes, pioneers are the guys with the big success. Sometimes
pioneers are the guys who are dead."
- Edward Esber, chairman of Ashton-Tate
"Doing is understanding"
- Scrawled on the wall of a Port-O-San along the Kalalau
Trail in Kauai, Hawaii
"You grow up the day you have the first real laugh at yourself."
- Ethel Barrymore
"The reaction to any new idea is first, 'It isn't true'; then
'It isn't new'; finally 'We knew it all the time'!"
- Ted Nelson
"Let's admit that the buzzwords 'user friendly' have about as much
credibility left as the expression 'truth in advertising.'"
- Jim Manzi, chairman and CEO of Lotus Development Corp.
"I want to build a machine that's proud of me."
- Danny Hillis, founder of Thinking Machines, Inc.
"If you ever need a helping hand, you'll find one at the end of
your arm."
- Yiddish proverb

"Few minds wear out; more rust out."

- Christian Nestell Bovee
"You should always go to people's funerals; otherwise, they won't come to yours."
- Yogi Berra
"The reason some men do not succees is because their wishbone is
where their backbone ought to be"
- Anonymous
"The squeaking wheel doesn't always get the grease. Sometimes it
gets replaced."
- Vic Gold
"Temptations, unlike opportunities, will always give you
many second chances."
- O. A. Battista

"True mathematics begins where common sense leaves off."

- Andrei N. Kolmogorov
"You mean now?"
- Yogi Berra when asked what time it was
"The cemetaries are filled with people who thought the world
couldn't get along without them."
- American proverb

"Nobody who ever gave his best regretted it."

- George "Pappa Bear" Halas
"Work relieves us three great evils; boredom, vice and want."
- French proverb
"The education of the will is the object of our existence."
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
"Try not to become a man of success but rather try to become a man of value."
- Albert Einstein
"I do not know how the Third World War will be fought, but I can tell you what
they will use in the Fourth -- rocks."
- Albert Einstein

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